
Something I’ve been noticing lately is that it’s much easier to fall into the trap of anxiety. I just gave birth to my second child, and postpartum is definitely a vulnerable time for many people emotionally.
As someone who has struggled with psychosis, I’m on the alert for any signs of falling back into that struggle. Honestly, I’ve been doing so well in that area. However, I have noticed myself struggling in other areas – especially with getting anxious about more than one thing.
One type of anxiety that I find myself wrestling with right now is worrying about my children’s safety. I think this is very common after giving birth. Your baby is so small and helpless, and it can be hard not to worry about them.
I find myself having intrusive thoughts about my children getting hurt. I also worry about accidentally hurting them myself.
Another thing that has me on edge is finances. Hospital bills can pile up after having a baby, and having to manage all that can fill me with worry. I have been hoping that I don’t experience any surprise expenses while I’m taking care of these bills.
Finally, another thing that I’ve been thinking about is politics. I don’t like to share my political views online, but I will share that the current climate has given me anxiety. I know I’m not alone in this. I find myself avoiding news stories because of how they affect me emotionally.
As I mentioned before in my mental health testimony, I struggle with psychosis related to a bipolar diagnosis. But this area of my life is really stable and secure right now. I don’t believe I am in danger of postpartum psychosis.
I truly believe that this onslaught of anxiety is a spiritual attack. I am strong in one area, so the enemy has to attack me somewhere else.
The thing about the enemy is that he can only attack you where you are weak. When you start to struggle with something, it’s important to recognize that this is an area that needs to be fortified.
I think any spiritual attack that has an effect on you can be viewed as a light being shined on an area that you need to work on.
When I start to wrestle with anxiety, my response is not to blame the anxiety on the enemy. Rather, I recognize that there are some areas of my life where I need to trust God more fully.
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7 NIV
Pouring my anxiety out to God has brought me to a deeper level of intimacy with him. I used to combat anxiety by reminding myself that my worst fears are unlikely to come to pass. However, there have been times in my life when my worst fears were realized.
In those moments, God drew me closer to him and sustained me. I no longer relieve my fears by telling myself that nothing bad with happen. Rather, I remind myself of God’s sovereign hand over my life.
I remember that way he held me through the worst moments of my life, and I know that should my fears ever materialize, he will be present with me. This is the place where my anxiety begins to subside: a place of deep and intimate trust in God’s plan for my life.
Do you wrestle with anxiety? Perhaps – like I used to – you relieve it by telling yourself that your fears are unlikely to come to pass. This reassurance can only take you so far.
I encourage you to dive deeper into your relationship with God and ask him to strengthen your faith and trust in his plan.
Freedom from anxiety can be found in a deep and trusting relationship with Jesus Christ, who is God. If you don’t have a relationship with him, I encourage you to invite him into your life. He has done so many good things for me, and I know he can do the same for you.
